Monday, September 21, 2015

A Sacred Season

You need to know something.

You, daughter of the King, in a godly and committed relationship.

These are the days you'll miss.  

And you may look forward with longing to your wedding day, you may dream of that sacred life together, you may spend some moments just wishing the time would hurry up and so you can be his wife, and raise a family, and life can be beautiful.

And yes, you know there will be hardships. You aren't that naive. You know it won't be easy.

But you just can't wait. You can't wait to get married and have a beautiful, strong, God-honoring marriage with the man you love. You can't wait to have your own home, to welcome him home from work, to pray with him each morning as his wife, to experience the mysteries of intimacy you two cannot share just yet...

You've got it all kept in your heart, just bursting.

You're waiting. And sometimes it hurts.

But you need to know something. 

This period of your life is short and fleeting. It is a treasure and it is sacred.

And it is the most important. 

You are building a foundation. Right now, this instant. Every little thing you say, every little thing you do. It's what you are doing now, what you did yesterday, and what you will do tomorrow.

Be realistic. Right now.

The habits you have. The attitudes you exude. The thoughts you think. The characteristics you cultivate.

Are you who you are supposed to be?

I know I'm not... and I've been aware of what I need to change for 3 years. And I've been trying to work on myself... for 3 years. And more stuff just pops up.

Will I ever be perfect? Will I ever be ready? No.
Not in my own right.

But I have a Savior who died to make me whole. The broken bits I feel, they don't exist anymore.
So why am I not perfect?

I still live as if I am bound to sin. I still mess up. Everyday!
I can toil and strain, but it won't mean a thing if I don't come to the throne of Grace.

Why am I not perfect, if He died and cleansed my Spirit? And also gave me is Holy Spirit to live in me?

Ah, I Spirit is saved... but my body and mind are still of this world.

And instead of fruitlessly trying to change them to be perfect, which they can never be, I need to cast off these things. I need to be dying to the body, to the mind. I need to be learning to live, think, walk, be in my Spirit. That is who I AM. Or who I could be, if I realized it.

This body, this mind, it will pass away. My Spirit will not, praise be to God.

We have such a huge opportunity, such potential to become, and yet we don't even know it. We don't know how, or why things just aren't working like they should. We miss the solution.

The answer is surrender. The answer is not relying on your own understanding. The answer is walking in the Spirit, with the Lover of your soul.

The joining of two into one is a Holy and momentous thing. I think the best way to begin to understand just how sacred it is... is first to understand just how sacred you are.

Walk with Him first. Be whole in Him first. Build the foundation of your identity, your life, upon Him, the Rock. Who you were designed to be, who He says you are. You are complete in Him. And only in Him. 

Do not think that you will find your purpose or worth through getting married, that a man just as human as you can do for you what God has already done, and is just waiting for you to reach out and accept.

Ready yourself. Find the truth, the whole truth, and stand firm upon it.

Do not rush. Do not wish away your life or pine for a day that is in God's capable, loving hands. There is no harm in waiting. There are only blessings to be had! Use this time wisely to grow more than you have ever grown, to strengthen yourself in Christ. Be who you were created to be, and watch His amazing plan for your life unfold.

Women, lay your foundation wisely. What you do now, and who you allow yourself to be now is what you will bring to a marriage in the future. You're deciding that for yourself today, this instant: what your marriage will be.

 Marriage is an empty box at the beginning- you don't get anything out of it. You put treasure into it. Make your treasures Spiritual, and build them up for yourselves in Heaven.

This is my advice to you, and to myself.


  1. It's so encouraging to know I'm not the only one who thinks this way. Thank you!

    We need to be so "Lost in God" that nothing else will matter to us. Because when our identity is in Him, we won't need to rely on relationships to give us worth, like so many girls do.
    Marriage is a gift that represents our relationship with God. We need to be so in love with God that we'll be able to accept this gift and give glory to the giver. Too many girls make more of the gift than the giver and that's when trouble starts. Yes, we need to make much of our guys but not to the point of leaving God out of the equation.
    I struggle with waiting. Half of me wants to be found while the other half wants to remain so lost in God that no man will ever be able to find my heart. I know I need to be somewhere in between, but some days I lean one way more than the other.
    I can heart-fully say Philippians 3: 12-14 ~
    "I have not yet reached my goal, and I am not perfect. But Christ has taken hold of me. So I keep running and struggling to take hold of the prize. I do not consider that I have made it on my own: but this one thing I do, forgetting what is behind, and straining towards what lies ahead, I press on towards the goal of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus."
    So, right now I'm trying the "Sleeping Beauty" concept. I'm not trying to find love I'm letting God have control of the whole thing, which involves me doing nothing but waiting (sleeping).
    You're right, what we do now sets the stage for who we will be when we are married. So, let's make the most of this free time to grow spiritually. Because a heart "lost" can only be found by the one God gave the map to.

  2. I'm not a young woman anymore, but I remember when I was. I sometimes think of what I would tell myself if I could go back and talk to my 18-year-old self. I didn't know much about God or life then. I'm not sure after 32 more years I can say with certainty that I know so much now. Life is a constant journey of searching and learning.

    But one thing I would say to myself is similar to what you're saying here. Get to know yourself before being married. To know you have enough in common with someone else, you have to know yourself pretty well. And to get to know yourself you have to venture out and learn and try all sorts of things to see what suits you and what doesn't. You need to interact with all sorts of people to notice what traits are good or not. I think the best way to do that is to work hard at contributing to the good of the world, seeing what problems you can solve for people. Study for a vocation and work at it. That gets you out into the world where you can gain the life experiences you need and does a lot of good along the way.

    You're both very right to avoid being preoccupied by men as so many girls are. It's natural to be concerned with marriage. It's the most important decision you'll make and has very far-reaching consequences for your life and your children's lives. So you need a clear head and time to make that decision.

    God bless you both!


Colossians 4:6 (AMP)
Let your speech at all times be gracious and pleasant, seasoned with salt, so that you will know how to answer each one [who questions you].